littlecatk

 

Fandom: Firefly

Music: Lana Del Rey - Gods and Monsters

Zoe Washburne after - (she is torn up plently but she will still fly true) the war always in the back of her mind like a numbing noise.

tumblr / archive

Notes:

i think this opening is really great: the attack on the valley is a great visual - the ships appearing & falling down bombs - fading in and out to the falling snowflakes.

I like all the fog/light etc messing up the vision like i am the guy who made the new Star Trek movie - because it is intentional, everything is foggy, the lines are not clear: Zoe steps into Serenity (what a wonderful heavy loaded name!) sceptic "garden of evil" while Mal shines like everything has to be alright from now on.
-their position as the the losing side, the "wrong" on in the history books of the alliance (the ones that River read in school ->the nice opening of the movie Serenity) - i always loved "Robin Hood"/petty criminal/underdog stories.

I love how tall and straight Zoe holds herself.
"I was an angel" set to Zoe shooting a man sets up a nice self-depreciating tone that feels accurate for Zoe's personality. Either it's using the darker, bloodier definition of "angel" or it's tongue-in-cheek, either which fits. -garrideb

There is a lot of Mal in this video - i hope that is okay - Zoe has put a lot of her decisions in his hands, her life, its a coping mechanism, it makes a lot of things easier, but while i am super interested in that aspect of their dynamic it is just an aspect not all of it, so I also love how Mal looks to her, for support and input, I am pretty sure there are people who watched the show and were (only/mostly) focused on Mal (because statistical it would be unlikly of it not happening, and also he is the Protagonist, white male able bodied - potrayed by a cis man)
"Shining like a fiery beacon" its their buisness, its their shared history, pain and in a way home too (bring me home) - he looks at her and in my vid it almost looks like he is asking her to weight in, make the decision final/out loud. 

Screwed up, scared, doing anything that I needed"the boy lies to them because he is desperated but Zoe and Mal ran too, dealing with the war by largely not dealing with it at all, the way the (so beautiful shining yellow) scene inside Serenity the first time is cut between it, its running away, but its also living on - moving on, trying - Zoe smiles and follows Mal - "Shinning like a fiery beacon" and the action begins again: because that journey - with all the unexpected trouble - turns out to be i think important for their healing process they bring him/(themself) home. "You got that medicine I need" Zoe and Mal (and Jayne, and Wash, Book, River,Simone,Kylee,Inara) are great damn heroes, but doing this, doing the "right" thing, the thing they feel is right even if they also feel/know how dangerous/stupid they are saves them too.

Headed towards a fucked up holiday"Zoe eats her apples like this because of traumatic war time expierinces, i played with the idea to make this transition/cut more drastic but then did a simple fading in again, a) because this is just technial easier for me b) this was more in line with the rest of the video even if it would have been interesting/nice to have one of the quick/loud flashes of flashback into show that different effects depending on factors (trigger/time/general state etc) - one of the main aspects of this video is how the war is like always in the back of her mind, a background noise, lenses that colour everything she expierinces, its not the loud/flashy/violent-nervous style that i have seen (and loved!) in a few of Bucky Barnes (Captain America - Marvel) fanvideos - but more numbness, dissociation.

The apples they eat are safe, but when they celebrate Simones birthday there is an explosion. The transition from the explosion- pushing Kaylee out of harms way to the basketball game worked well (mimicing the scene before where Mal push her out of the way of an explosion)  - "Life imitates art" sometimes the horrors feel more real then the "savety"/the now.

no one is going to take my soul away" the confront Mal scene is from the first ep. she disaggrees with his choice of buisness partner because he tried to shot Mal (which Mal tries to shrug off). I feel like I should have prepared something to say about the constallation of Mal/Zoe/Wash - because i am sure there were parts of the fandom that got ugly with shipping - but - i have nothing. the way Wash symbolis/embodies "inocents" for Zoe a bit. two scenes in the medibay, Wash losing his cool when she is hurt and and the "redemptation" of the Wash/Mal/Zoe conflict with both of them smiling at Mal who wakes up in the medibay. 
I like that you didn't go with the obvious choice of clip for "looking to get fucked hard" because Mal flirting with Zoe brings the other definition of "fucked" to mind, that Zoe really could be signing her own death warrant by staying with Mal. -garrideb 

Dope, shoot it up, straight to the heart please"the dinner scene where Jayne reach over to get another piece - most of the times one/I try not to use a scene more then once, but here I did, on purpose, this dinner scene actually is not a repeat, but it evokes the scene with Simones birthday, the scene after that is a direct repeat its that explosion, so are the war flashbacks - repetation - one reason is of cause limited skill/resources but also it is the same scene, this is not a new treat but her mind being chaught in the old one (i know all this is just in my head but knowing that does not nessary make it dissapear)

"No one's gonna take my soul away" I really like the fade in/blue sparks/fog obscouration - its clichee but it is effectiv for me. 
the dichotomy between Zoe the destroyer and Zoe the builder-[Bad username or unknown identity:  ](the sparks of the repair are after Wash funeral. to ensure Serenity will still fly. fixing things as a better/healtier coping method then violence,codependency etc. that are also in this video.

I love the rows of funerals "Fuck yeah give it to me this is heaven, what I truly Want"

The fading into black - and her standing still like that before snapping into action - I like the effect here because it emphasize the dissociation. 

"When you talk it's like a movie and you're making me Crazy" When we are backed up against a wall we often use old coping methods that are not always approative. The transition between her screaming to action to the kid running to Kylee -movment workin as a connection - cut between by the explosion  not sure if that works but it was something i though could be interesting. 

"If I get a little prettier can I be your baby?" The contrast of them walking in with Book (Kylee with the kid) vs the white/blue Planet with the failed project - how she is the one who is walking/acting with such control/skill.

"I'm living like Jim Morrison" ft Mals face seeing the destruction of Brooks place/the one of the Serenity Valley. The show does not show us Zoes face to it, and their feelings are not interchangable but it is a frame of reference "Like Jim Morrision" this is a bit of snap at the canon and a snap at the work of transformative fanwork, dealing with emotions by letting (other) fictional characters deal with emotions.  I don´t know if thats just me through and if it just throws everyone out of the loop - if yes i am sorry.

We are coming back to the dinner table. Inara scolds/teases Mal about "playing with his guns" there (and there is a certain macho-playing there) - Zoe and Wash strapping guns on is death serious through they have to rescue Mal - keeping your guns in good shape is important for surrival - and it has also some sort of soothing effect to know you are prepared if something happens - and then there is Jayne (who defintily has some weird macho-playing) but while he is at it people come to the table to eat - like it is natural.

Zoe follows Mal into Serenity.

(The last scene. The war again is after the song ends. It is still there. But live goes on)

 

“Kill what you can't save

what you can't eat throw out

what you can't throw out bury

What you can't bury give away

 

what you can't give away you must carry with you,

it is always heavier than you thought.”

-Margaret Atwood, You are Happy